Well outside the Blackwater’s flood plain, on higher ground north of the town, with no meaningful surface-water risk. The cul-de-sac drains to a soakaway, which the owner here would tell you about at length.

Well below average — 37 reported crimes near this area in July 2026, mostly vehicle crime and anti-social behaviour. Two reports of cloaked figures loitering by the alley off Magnolia Crescent were closed, no further action.

Nitrogen dioxide and particulates sit comfortably inside healthy limits; the M3 is far enough south to never reach here. The one emissions event on record was a chimney at number 4 discharging several hundred letters over a weekend in 1991.

Low radon potential — not a radon Affected Area, as with almost all of Surrey. Readings are taken at the lowest occupied level, which here would mean the cupboard under the stairs. Occupied, for a good long while.

About 48 decibels through the day — a cul-de-sac picks up almost nothing. What you will hear instead is next door’s lawnmower, and this one’s, pushed by somebody who did not volunteer.

Farnborough is about 4 miles south-west and this address sits under the edge of its circuit — private jets, a handful of movements an hour. Residents also report heavy low-altitude owl traffic in late July, concentrated here.

The Ascot–Guildford line runs about a mile south, screened by housing and trees. Close enough to walk to, too far to hear. Nothing scarlet has ever been seen on it.

No high-voltage lines, pylons or substations near the street — the nearest run is over a mile away across the golf course. Nothing to spoil a view the owner is very proud of.

A 48-unit retirement scheme granted 0.6 miles away, plus 4 smaller applications within a mile — including two at this address, one of which the council turned down flat.

About 40 miles from the nearest coast, so nothing to report — we run the check anyway. The closest this household has come to coastal exposure was a night on a rock in the sea, on crisps and four bananas.

Full-fibre reaches this postcode at up to 900 Mbps, though available is not the same as installed. Ofcom’s model makes no allowance for magic, which is the other thing that takes the line down round here.

Reliable 4G from all four networks and 5G from three. The landline at this address spends long stretches off the hook by choice, so do not read too much into how quiet the place is.

The nearest primary is 0.4 miles, rated Good; the nearest secondary a Good comprehensive 1.1 miles off. Ofsted covers England only, which is why the Scottish boarding school that takes the odd child off this street comes back unrated.

The nearest GP surgery is 0.45 miles away, about a 9-minute walk. Whether anyone here is registered is another matter — this household treats an ailment as attention-seeking.

A pharmacy in the parade is 0.35 miles off, about a 7-minute walk. Fine for plasters; for anything stirred counter-clockwise you want an apothecary, and the nearest is a train ride and a brick wall away.

Frimley Park has a full A&E 3.4 miles away, about a 12-minute drive — one of the better-placed addresses in Surrey. The other hospital this street has used is entered through a shop window and appears in no NHS directory.

6 dentists within 2 miles, the nearest a 10-minute walk. Ring round before counting on NHS books. None is the husband-and-wife practice that turned out the cleverest witch of her age; its owners emigrated at short notice.

7 nurseries and childminders within 2 miles, the nearest a 6-minute walk. The cheapest on this street is the lady two roads over with the cats, who charges nothing and smells powerfully of boiled cabbage.

A playground on the recreation ground off Magnolia Crescent is 0.25 miles away, with a second beyond. The swings have been broken since the mid-nineties and everybody knows which boy from number 4 did it.

A Sainsbury’s is 0.9 miles away and a Tesco Express 0.35. Aldi and Waitrose both within 3 miles. All four sell grapefruit, on which one member of this household holds strong and well-documented views.

The recreation ground is 250 yards away, with two more parks and a stretch of common within a mile. Green space is the one thing this part of Surrey never runs short of.

21 venues within about a mile and a quarter (11 restaurants, 6 cafés, 4 pubs). Most of it clustered on the high street rather than near the street itself.

5 takeaways within about a mile and a quarter. This counts venues Google categorises for takeaway or delivery, not live platform coverage.

3 pubs within about a mile, the nearest 0.7 miles off. This is golf club territory. All three have their door on the street and their name over it, which is more than the Leaky Cauldron manages.

No barber within 2 miles advertises itself as Turkish. Haircuts at this address have historically been done in the kitchen with sewing scissors — mixed results, and on one occasion a full regrowth by morning.

2 vape shops within 2 miles, both on the high street. Counted from shops Google lists as selling vapes, so a corner shop with a stand behind the till will not show.

6 gyms and fitness venues within 2 miles, the nearest a 16-minute walk. Boxing club included, which the local teenagers have made good use of.

A Post Office counter in the parade is 0.35 miles away, with 3 banks and 5 cash machines within 2 miles. The nearest bank open through the night is Gringotts, on no high street we can find.

4 vets within 2 miles, the nearest an 18-minute walk. None of them list owls, which is worth knowing before you take one on.

The town library is 0.7 miles away, about a 14-minute walk. No restricted section, and it lends to anyone holding a utility bill rather than a signed note from a professor.

The nearest pool is 1.4 miles away, about a 6-minute drive. Lessons are heavily oversubscribed in term time. No Quidditch pitch inside the search radius, though nobody here would thank you for one.

An allotment site is 0.55 miles away, about an 11-minute walk; most run a waiting list, so check with the council. The garden at this address is kept to a standard that would make the site look untidy.

The tip is 2.6 miles away, about a 9-minute drive. Handy for what a wheelie bin will not cover, and for anything you would rather the neighbours did not see going out.

Sandhurst Memorial parkrun is 2.2 miles away and Frimley Lodge 2.6 — both a drive rather than a jog. The mile around the door is mostly pavement and cul-de-sac. The only sustained running from this address was away from the house.

Around 78% owner-occupied (England 61%), 15% privately rented, 6% social. Streets like this are where that figure comes from. Muggle households throughout, as far as anyone can tell — the census does not ask. Census 2021.

Well below the national level. About 36% of households in this part of Surrey Heath are deprived on at least one of the four census measures, against 51.6% across England. Census 2021.

In March 2026 the Home Office had 84 people on its books across the whole of Surrey Heath, none in a hotel — ordinary rented housing spread around the borough. It is a council-area count, so it tells you nothing about this street.

Band D in Surrey Heath is £2,318 a year, though a four-bed semi here is more likely Band E or F — budget nearer £2,800–£3,350. The VOA counts bedrooms, and does not count cupboards, however long somebody has slept in one.

Homes on this postcode sold 5 times in five years, £498,000 to £645,000, against a Surrey Heath average of £487,400 (UK House Price Index, June 2026). Number 4 has not changed hands in over twenty-five years.

3 bus stops within half a mile, the nearest 300 yards off, with roughly two buses an hour into town. There is also a triple-decker that will stop anywhere for a stranded traveller, but it is not in the timetable.

The nearest station is 1.1 miles away, with services to Waterloo in about an hour with a change. One household here makes the run into King’s Cross instead, every 1 September, for a platform that has never appeared on the departure boards.

Unrestricted on-street parking the whole length, and most houses have a drive and garage besides. Nobody on Privet Drive has ever fallen out over it — the only car to cause a scene left from a first-floor window.

One live job within half a mile, a gas connection under temporary lights, with 3 more booked inside the mile. The footway outside number 4 has been relaid twice in thirty years, both times after subsidence nobody could account for.

2 public charge points within about a 10-minute walk, the nearest 0.5 miles at the supermarket. Off-street parking makes a home charger straightforward, if the householder can be persuaded electric cars are not a fad.

The nearest petrol station is 0.8 miles away on the main road, about a 3-minute drive. Handy for a company car putting in motorway miles for a drill manufacturer.

A few mapped cycle lanes within a mile, mostly along main roads and little of it joined up. Quiet residential streets make local runs pleasant. The one racing bike on this street has covered under a mile in fifteen years.

Two councils cover this address: Surrey Heath does bins, planning and the council tax bill; Surrey County Council does schools, social care and roads. Both are abolished in April 2027 and replaced by a single unitary, West Surrey Council.

Dr Al Pinkerton has held Surrey Heath since July 2024. No sitting member has yet been asked to take up an admissions dispute with a school that Ofsted cannot find.